Opening to God in weakness

"The Lord is my Shepherd, I lack nothing..." Psalm 23:1

Last week, our staff team at Union Center was considering the entire Psalm 23 during our midday retreats with God.  On different days, as I conversed with Jesus about this Psalm, He engaged me in different ways.  During a couple days He used this passage to bring great comfort, and to remind me of his presence and love with me.  However, on another day He seemed to use the phrase "I lack nothing", in verse 1, to point out parts of my heart that resisted accepting this phrase as truth.  It almost seemed like my heart was tasting something bitter as I heard the words.  (This was very connected with the areas of my heart being exposed by the bumps along the way that day.)

Maybe you have experienced something similar.  The meaning of a passage doesn't change, but the Holy Spirit used it to expose different parts of our heart on different days.  In these moments, we have the opportunity to partner with God in the reality of our heart that is exposed.  I can present my response and say "Here I am."  I can respond like this whether my reaction is hope or despair, faith or doubt, joy or sadness.  I can converse with Jesus about this and allow His love and presence to be given to me in my weakness.  In this way I can truly find God present with me in my pain, sin, and limitations.

Or, we can have other responses.  An unhealthy response I have often used is to push an experience of my weakness from the view of my mind's eye.  I have often done this because I didn't think that I "ought" to have had an experience of doubt, resistance, or anger to a passage in the Bible...and as such, must hide that experience from God.  However, this response causes me to avoid Jesus, and to miss an experience of His presence in my neediest places.

Well, how about you?  How do you respond to yourself and God when you have a less than favorable reaction to a passage of Scripture?